83.

ribit, ribit

"If you don't mind I was here first, and as you can see the situation is dire. Now you've said your piece about the 80's, horrible decade, but we've got our own problems to deal with." said Erhard

"With all due respect sir, with a wardrobe like that, you look to be the least qualified to make any comments on what was or wasn't, is or isn't fashionable. The 80's had its short comings to be sure, but it's ready to make a comeback." said Davis

"OAUGHUEHHE" said Daly and Koopa.

Erhard snuck a glance at his outfit, it was bright yellow and red, of course he knew that already, but he wasn't used to being insulted by strangers that materialised in brilliant flashes of light, he found it to be rather rude; All the more so, because his reclamation of the proverbial talking stick was so short lived, he'd been disarmed by the cocky guest almost immediately. He tried again" "Who said anything about fashion?" was all he could come up with. After that he thought of a million other things that would have been a hundred times wittier.

Melanie was about to make a psychological breakthrough and disencumber a portion of her inner child before these two strange men appeared on the scene, although they were no less strange than the man she was already dealing with, perhaps they leaned a little closer to normality than this ever-groaning zombie guy and for that she was resentfully grateful. Here she was getting bailed out again, same old Mel. Between these freaks, the redundant, overly abundant frogs; and the worst date of her life (the only date), she couldn't see how an invasion from the eighties could make things any worse.

"Authors with bad ideas, the return of the 80's, I don't understand." she said.

It looked like Erhard's attempts at heroism were marginally interesting at best to these people. They obviously couldn't be bothered with anything he had to say. Sometimes he didn't know what the point was in trying.

"All will be explained, friends." pronounced Davis, which was a rather forward relational label given that none of the group knew anyone else's name.

A ball of light surrounded them and shrank in on itself until they all disappeared. That's when Brandon showed up (and died).

74.

"Oh hi Premnath."

"Hey Bil. Dittie I'm off to bed you two try and keep it down OK, it's been a flame grilled whopper of a day." ribit, ribit "&*^%#$! frogs. "

Bilix strolled out to join Dittie in the quasi-kitchen-living-alcove-room section of the comfy sized apartment"I like whoppers? What did he mean?"

"Don't worry about it Bil, let him sleep it off. "

"Anyways, care to join me in here I thought we were staking out the bathroom together."

"In a minute Bilix, I'm watching something here. Any second now Goku is going to wax Freezer's tail."

"How can you watch this crap. It's over 20 years old for starters and --"

"Your over two thousand years old, you don't see me complaining."

"Well, aside from your having watched this a million times already, this is one of those shows that just drags on and on, promising action, but we could come back in two months time and Goku would still be powering up his spirit bomb. Nothing happens. It kind of reminds me of something/someone."

57.

"Stratify my nutsack, things haven't been this crazy since before I can remember." said Bilix.

"Eh, I've seen worse." replied Ditie .

"Lets take stock of the situation here. Some thing's up."

"I don't see why we should, I mean it's pretty obvious. The frogs are coming home to roost. Think about it, everything is here because some such thing came crawling out of the oceans ages ago. Frogs are amphibians. They're the missing link between the oceans and the land. They're just reminding us of their evolutionary importance."

"No one talks like that."

"I do."

"ahuh."

ribit, ribit.

Bilix needed more than just his mind to process his thoughts, intense thinking was always evident on the surface. It seemed to be a bit of a strain. "There could be a lot of levels at work here. I mean it could be anything. What if the atoms are upset, or worse the superstrings?"

"Bilix I strum on the super strings of the guitar of god and live to tell the tale. You're over reacting."

54.

ribit, ribit

The paddy wagon turned a corner and hit a thick patch of green ice (the new term for multiple frogs affecting driving conditions). It wavered in its course, then gave in to its high centre of gravity, toppling over. One small crash for men, one giant leap for the fatalities of frog kind. The statistics were staggering, but no matter how many herps hopped to that great lily pad in the sky their numbers were always bolstered seemingly by some ancient hyper hydra spell, remove one frog and a million would take its place. Not even rabbits could procreate this quickly, even if you couldn't do the math, something didn't add up.

Erhard crawled out of the back of his transportation. Hadn't this happened in Commando, except Arnie was liberated by a rocket launcher that blew up the vehicle without causing him injury? The cops in this ride had been spared the fate of their movie counterparts, but were out cold in the front. Erhard managed to emerge relatively unscathed. This could be the hero turn he was looking for.

Ironically the frogs were Erhard's mini saviours, he could've bundled them all up there (the ones that had aided him in his miraculous escape) and showered flowery German kisses over every one -- if they hadn't already been smeared like a healthy looking yet strangely off putting condiment across the tarmac. There was no time for this sentimental sniveling, action was required, but first he needed to get his bearings. He decided to ask the peculiar couple who were fidgeting around and trying on the public rubbish bin?

37.

ribit, ribit

Deborah Salin, the city Mayor stepped up to the podium.

"My fellow citizens, in recent days our beloved city has been over run by what can only be described as a plague of frogs."

A politician who didn't mince words, Deborah was a rare breed.

"Despite my allusions to Biblical language, I assure you that this is not the Apocalypse no matter what your priests or millennial death cult leaders may say. There have been reports of pillars of light and phantom explosions. I am quite certain that these phenomena are highly exaggerated and are not in any way tied to the frog outbreak. We have mobilized the national guard to ensure your protection, we have our finest herpetologists working on the matter as --"

ribit

"Herpetologists? Mayor Salin, these critters aren't some STD that any conventional treatment can cure. Extraordinary events, call for extraordinary action." Came the voice of a German accented, flamboyantly dressed, man in the back. He appeared to be armed with a personal microphone and speakers.

Frogs slowly began infiltrating the hall.

Deborah pinched the bridge of her nose. "Dear God, what now."

In response the man simply raised his pipe and smiled.

Deborah shook her head. "I've read that story before and it didn't end well, security please remove this man and shove that pipe somewhere where I wont have to see it again."

27.

ribit, ribit.

Brandon had almost certainly suffered a mild form of cardiac arrest. He was bent over on all fours. To complement his heart troubles his mind was suffering the indignity of trying to contain a multiplicity of errant thoughts all at once: Was he going die? Kill the flying man. Melanie stuck. Rubbish bin. Learn to fly and what was that stupid noise?

ribit

A green wall was moving toward him.

12.

ribit, ribit.

Koopa's tongue wisped to the beat of the birth of the exponentially exploding frog population in his seemingly shrinking enclosure. It was as if Moses himself had come down from heaven, confused Daly's room with Egypt and unleashed holy terror on Koopa's habitat.

Koopa became concerned when the plague of frogs began to inhibit the use of his nostrils. This would never do, oxygen was a necessity.

Maybe the world was a horrible place were over eager consumer minded creatures eeked out an existence by claiming and controlling limited resources. Maybe there wasn't enough to go around. Deep thoughts for a reptilian brain.

The rapidly changing frightening new world he faced left him with few options. He could eat his way out of this mess, despite his lack of appetite or he could drown in the sea of frogs. Making decisions had never been his strong suit. He needed more time to think.

ribit, ribit.

4.

ribit, ribit

"I don't understand, he's not eating again. I'm going to have to start a damn pet shop just to get rid of these things."

"They're so cute though. I swear if the SPCA ever found out about this racket, you'd probably end up as Michael Vick's celly. Hey,I had this guy come into work today. You coulda fed him to your little beasty. Koopa probably feels guilty about eating the puppies, but you put another monster in there with him and he'd let loose, my guy woulda been perfect."

"That's dumb and you sound more depraved than I am."

ribit, ribit

"You're not depraved Daly, you're just misunderstood. Animal sacrifice is perfectly normal."

"Funny. Well C, shall we take one of these mutts for a walk while I think about what to do with them. I'm gonna drop by Simon's long the way. You shoulda heard him earlier. I mean I know he's crazy, but it's like he's constantly trying to out do himself."

ribit

"What are we gonna do there?"

"Go to the moon."