Monday, January 10, 2011

near death experience 1

this actually happened...

I'm contemplating a 1 hour bike ride to work at 4 o'clock in the morning after recently losing my licence. Some Hectic Chick, who shall remain nameless, txts me to get my ass to some club so I can unleash my unco white boy dance moves on an unsuspecting world. I'm always down for brightening the dark days of my contemporaries through my selfless dedication to my personal misfortune/misdeeds. But then there's that bike ride. She sweetens the deal, a lift to work in the morning, which can mean only one thing... She owns a car ;). It's on. I should have known better. Not on a school night Loren!

I rock up to Cavil Ave in Surfers (I'm thinking I should skip the foreplay and go straight to the climax, but the introduction of certain characters is essential to the story). We are literally surrounded by a killer bee colony swarm of 18 year old zombies (It's schoolies week in Surfers which means the place is crawling with reminders of my advanced years, high school graduates everywhere argh). I value my brains so I begin drinking and Hectic Chick's Hyper Flatmate suggests we leave.

We arrive in the slightly more mature part of town: Broadbeach (the usually 21 and over crowd). Wow, everyones dressed up all classy-like, micro-minis and stilettos as far as the eye can see. Guys got their collars popped and their fake alligator skin shoes shined. I'm wearing chucks and my old school player (nintendo) T, maybe I should go back to Surfers.

Hyper Flatmate chick jumps out the taxi and waves down 2 dudes! 1,2, wait that makes 5 of us, good one Hyper Flatmate chick! Turns out it's just as well that she did. The new boys have a particular skill set that comes in handy later...

next: "just so happens your friend here is only mostly dead" TBC

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