Wednesday, December 22, 2010

3 day benders: not recommended, unless...

"From now on the gym will be my beer, and feeling good will be my hangover." -- Homer Simpson

I've almost reacclimated myself with reality. The universe as we experience it is governed by certain laws. The Law of The Conservation of Energy being one of the least of my favourites: energy cannot be created or destroyed only transformed. There's no free lunch. You get what you pay for. The cost of 3 all nighters in concert with binge drinking is far greater than the current negative total of my bank balance.

I suffer from Delusional Invincibility Syndrome (DIS). I have difficulty believing that anything can impede my progress. Not other peoples agendas, not self abuse, not the laws of physics. Nothing. This is where getting to know reality really helps matters. The last few days I woke up with an unpleasant preview of old age. "So, this is what it feels like to be decrepit?" Perhaps I should slow down, before the brakes are applied permanently and without my approval.

Have you ever been an introvert before? Life has so many wonderful contradictions. I have DIS, which is useful except when talking to other people. There's some kind of socializing kill switch in my brain that is involuntarily triggered at the most inconvenient of times. Alcohol is my social DIS. Pray you never meet me in one of my drunken stupors. In such a state I can talk anyone under the table. Alternatively when I come to, I feel even less inclined to talk to anyone than normal. 3 days have past since the big bender concluded and I finally acknowledged the existence of my room mate with a curt "hi". Unfortunately false courage, whatever form it takes, also has a price.

When consuming alcohol the trade off seems to be brain cells, perpetual poorness, several days of lost productivity, and creaky old man bones. Why speed up the dying process and cause unnecessary stress? Because drinking is fun!?!

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