People protest outside a subway sandwich shop dressed in chicken suits. That's what comes to mind at this pivotal moment; That, and Jared's amazingly large pants. He lost a lot of weight eating subway. We should all be so lucky. If I lost any weight eating anything at all, than things would be no different from what they are now.
I pick up a pack of half a dozen free range eggs, this has become the benchmark of the environmentally honourable among us. All those chickens stuffed into tiny cages, all those politically cognizant people stuffed into chicken suits. I can't allow their sacrifice to go in vain. I'll pay the extra 30 cents it costs for the chicken embryos that had uncaged mothers. I feel like a responsible citizen.
Cognitive dissonance sets in. Never a good thing. I pinch the Jordan cap I just bought from foot locker with my free hand; in all probability it was manufactured in the human equivalent of a chicken cage. It cost me $30, of which the person who produced it probably got 0.00252 cents. I call audible on the play and switch to the caged chicken variety. A small part of me dies, but at least I'm consistent. And I just saved 30 cents.